The Dark Side

Lest you think it is all fun and games up here in the 49th state, let me share some of the more mundane and less fortunate aspects of our existence...

SUBS. Like how everything is a bit more expensive. Not to the extreme, but in funny little ways that add up after a long day. For example, the famous Subway "Five dollar footlong." I remember getting that goddamn catchy song in my head on a weekly basis back in Oregon. Well up here my jingle memory gets jarred by an alarming difference... "Six. Six dollar. Six dollar footloooooong." Plus tax. Gone are the days of being able to score not one but two footlongs for the family picnic with a single ten dollar bill. Then there are the bins at Walmart (I know, forgive me) labeled "1 Dollar." But upon closer inspection, everything inside is individually labeled "1 Dollar and 12 Cents." Plus tax. I haven't even tried to find an official "Dollar Store," let alone go into one, for fear of what I might find. Gas - more expensive - despite the fact that we can honestly see oil rigs off of our beach in the Cook Inlet. (No, we can not see Russia.) I think the only thing we seem to have in the "less expensive" category is salmon, because so far it has been free. If we mention to a friend or neighbor that we ate our last salmon fillet last night, a new stash of fresh red flesh arrives in minutes. I suppose that's not a bad price to pay in exchange for six... six dollar... six dollar footlongs...

THE OLD MAN IS SNORING. Now we have lived in some rainy places before. San Francisco in the summer, Oregon... but oh my oh me my. I'll let the numbers do the talking:

• Normal average September rainfall for Kenai, Alaska = 2.5 inches
• Rainfall yesterday in Kenai, Alaska =  5 inches
• Total so far this month in Kenai, Alaska = 15 inches

 Indigo and I have taken to having rubber ducky races in the river (think street) in front of our house. And J invested in a new man toy to help in his commute to work. Two wheels just wasn't cutting it in the puddles...

CHARLIE BROWN. Having come from the mecca of quaint family farms and u-pick parties in the Hood River valley, we find ourselves in a sad situation. There does not appear to be a single pumpkin patch on the Kenai Peninsula. Out of the 150-million acre network of protected lands and waters that make up the Kenai National Wildlife Refuge, no one eked out a single spot to grow a freaking pumpkin! Indigo went from always having a Cinderella pumpkin carved with her name (while it was still growing - this is an amazing idea we hadn't seen before) and lovingly guarded by the farm dogs at Rasmussen farms, to the plastic dipped squashes in the cardboard bins at Walmart (there it is, again!). To quote Linus, "Oh, Great Pumpkin, where are you?"

So go enjoy a true five dollar footlong, pick a great pumpkin, and think of us washing away up here in the great state of Alaska! (Okay, so the duck racing is actually pretty fun what with the high stakes drains and rogue neighborhood dogs; and J does look pretty hot on his trike... I think we're gonna make it!)